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Hope I'm not too late to this party seeing as it's one of my FAVORITE subjects.

I'm on a personal crusade regarding these simple-minded young black mothers perming their kids hair at such a young age. First of all, these NO-LYE kiddie perms are disgusting. They dry the hair out and load it with calcium build-up. After the first couple of the weeks, the hair takes on this dull, filmy, ugly, off-color, mousy brown look. Second, these perms destroy the edges of these girls' hair. As these girls age, their hairline recedes more and more and results in what I call BIG FOREHEAD SYNDROME. By the time, these young girls reach puberty, their hair is destroyed, and they have these really huge looking foreheads.

ASK YOURSELVES THIS QUESTION: Is straight hair more important for a 5 year old to have or a 16 year old? This is not a TRICK QUESTION.

You can't let children make these kinds of decisions. Everyone here comes to this board for the purpose of getting advice on how to care for relaxed, overprocessed hair. We suffer everything from shedding, hair breakage, and fragile weak hair. Who in their right mind would inflict these things on a 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, etc, year old?

Hair care for young girls has never been easier. There are so many products:

Culture's 7 day relaxer is excellent, I use it with LottaBody's Blow Drying lotion which has more oil and provides a sheen. For a straight look, use generously, blow dry and flat iron using a silicone serum. Obviously, if the child gets caught in the rain or goes in the water, the hair will revert, but basically the hair should remain straight for a week. Sleep in a satin cap or on a Satin Pillow.

I also use the Culture and Lottabody product for non-straight styles. After shampooing and conditioning, apply a small amount mixed together and comb through hair. Then apply Cantu's Shea Butter Lotion generously. Comb and brush the hair and style in braids, twists, several pony tails whatever.

Some good conditioners:

Pantene's Hydrating Curls
Avon's Olive Oil Mask
Aubrey Organics Island Replenishing Conditioner ($$)
Alberto VO 5 Kiwi Lime Clarifying Conditioner for Condition washes.

Shampoo

I swear by Kids Organics Shea Butter Shampoo, very gentle and non stripping.

Also Gerbers Grins & Giggles Baby Washes, especially the Milk & Honey make excellent hair washes.

Just remember to always follow with a good moisturizing conditioner. There are a lot out there, experiment and find the right one for your little one and for your pocketbook.

I also swear by Johnson & Johnson's No More Tears Detangler (DO NOT USE THEIR SHAMPOOS. DRIES OUT BLACK HAIR.) It's the best detangler because it doesn't leave an oily residue and since most blacks like a lot of pomades and oils and stuff, this is the best one to use.

Here in NY you can find a hair pomade called Nature's Blessing. I love this stuff. Gives a nice sheen. It's green and is basically a bergamont formula with herbs, olive oil etc.

Also, get a good texturizing serum or gel. Lottabody's Extreme Curling Gel, Marc Anthony's Curling Serum, Noodlehead available at Sally Beauty. Mix them until you find the one that encourages curl.

A WIDE TOOTH COMB. I can't believe that some parents still try to comb black hair texture with a rattail, fine toothed comb. UNBELIEVABLE!!! Yes, the rattail end is great for parting, so keep one handy, but for combing, a wide tooth comb is a must.

The Jane Carter Solution makes execellent products but are pricey.

We need to get creative and destroy this idea for our little girls that only straight hair is beautiful. Why not experiment with natural hairstyles that braid portions of the hair with beads? I mean use your imagination. And parents simply have to explain what chemicals are to their girls. Do a demonstration. Put some relaxer on an old dolls hair and let your girls see how it eats the hair.

And check out the website naturallycurly.com. They have great tips. It's not just a site for curly haired white girls.

Most important is keeping the hair refreshed and conditioned.

As far as little boys needing their hair braided. Well I come from a different generation. I can't imagine why on earth active little boys would want to sit still for hours getting their braided. I hate to imagine what that means with regard to their developement down the line. I think our young black men have taken this braid thing too far. Braids, sometimes... not all the time. I mean how much time are these guys investing in this. And for what?? It basically is just an OK STYLE. It ain't all that.

Hope this helps.